Michelle, the first thing that strikes me here is that fantastic black "border" -- really great! And you did a good job distributing your shapes to form the central cluster of objects. That said, I think the clocks would be stronger if they weren't so obviously identifiable. Maybe you could go over each with a slice of something else? The horse statue might also benefit from being partially obscured in places -- that too seems to appear whole everywhere. Fracturing the objects will give us more of a sense of the multiple views. Finally, since the border shape is so dark, I'd love to see some small darker shapes in the center here and there -- just so the contrast between inner and outer wouldn't be so dramatic.
This isn't much of a critique, but more of a comment. Your drawing gives off a a lot of amusement park vibes. Something about the giant clock and horse figure resembles a Ferris wheel and carousel.
It feels like you left your objects whole. I think you can go one step further into separating the objects into smaller shapes just so they're not so recognizable.
I agree with Sidney, this peice looks like a map of an amusement park. I am not sure if it is intentional for you to add the black boarder for the map effect, but I think creating more small white shape on top of the black can keep the same vibe, and make the composition more interesting.
Michelle, the first thing that strikes me here is that fantastic black "border" -- really great! And you did a good job distributing your shapes to form the central cluster of objects. That said, I think the clocks would be stronger if they weren't so obviously identifiable. Maybe you could go over each with a slice of something else? The horse statue might also benefit from being partially obscured in places -- that too seems to appear whole everywhere. Fracturing the objects will give us more of a sense of the multiple views. Finally, since the border shape is so dark, I'd love to see some small darker shapes in the center here and there -- just so the contrast between inner and outer wouldn't be so dramatic.
ReplyDeleteThis isn't much of a critique, but more of a comment. Your drawing gives off a a lot of amusement park vibes. Something about the giant clock and horse figure resembles a Ferris wheel and carousel.
ReplyDeleteIt feels like you left your objects whole. I think you can go one step further into separating the objects into smaller shapes just so they're not so recognizable.
- Sidney
DeleteI agree with Sidney, this peice looks like a map of an amusement park. I am not sure if it is intentional for you to add the black boarder for the map effect, but I think creating more small white shape on top of the black can keep the same vibe, and make the composition more interesting.
ReplyDelete